Monday 18DEC00 - Last night I wrote "Silent Song", a song lyric, a creation deeply satisfying to me. I sent an e-mail copy of it to three friends. . . . . I am certain it has far more meaning to me than to most others. . . . . Tuesday 19DEC00 - St. Alphonsus Rodriquez, you and I both know I messed up today. Yes, most of my 360 minutes at work were difficult for me, especially physically; but I missed a great opportunity to use the adversities I faced as a means of atoning for my many sins because I too often complained about them. Perhaps tomorrow I will be fired; but if not, I ask you to help me (though Jesus) to cease complaining. Thank you. Wednesday 20DEC00 - No doubt my current job is putting a strain on my back, but I did manage to complain far less today. Tomorrow my work will be a shortened one, bookended by two major appointments, one at 8:30am and one at 2pm. I am not expecting either to be pleasant. - - - This morning I made several calls regarding our moving. If I can get all that is needed ready to go, we will likely move this mobile home to another Gainesville-area location just after New Year's. I think I already know where, even though that is not my preference; but it would be the most monetarily sensible one. It is, alas, far from where I am now working, but I am going to seek a second job, and that might be closer to our new address. - - - Due to a certain action I had to take, a government check I am to get may get delayed, a circumstance that could cause a bill problem. - - - One bright "thank-the-Lord" event which occurred today was the arrival of money I desperately need. Thursday 21DEC00 - Unusually busy appointment day. At my 2pm meeting today I was given a large book. The task it mandates is extensive, and it will take many hours to complete. It may even cause to miss making daily entries here, especially since I must also attend to the task of getting our home moved. Friday 22DEC00 - Stabat Mater, generally ascribed to Blessed Jacopone da Todi. Upon conducting a search, I finally found the original Latin and an English version at a site named Making of America. I added it [that site] to my Thinking Lizard favorite places. - - - My work day again was long and tiring. - - - After reading the Stabat Mater, I began to sing what I could remember of the Tantum Ergo. I am now going to search for it. Saturday 23DEC00 - Janice, my wife, has always deserved someone other than me, someone much better; and I have never deserved anyone. I do not know what is wrong with my brain, but it definitely is not wired right. So skewed is it I would not be surprised if upon examination I, the bearer of it, would be found to be insane. Sunday 24DEC00 - This b thing is f nasty, and mostly because of my writings. Luckily, I do have some secure records, but there is so much which is not yet settled into book form that finding a satis- factory way to account for it is going to be--however worth- while--difficult. Add to which the number of books and tapes I have, though far fewer than I once had; and our various tools, utensils, dishes, clothes, furnishings, etcetera, accomplishing what I need to accomplish in the time I wish to accomplish it in is going to be stone difficult. Monday 25DEC00 - Didn't finish cataloging all my books, but I did get many useless items cleared off my shelves and tossed into the dumpster. All the stirred dust allowed the dust mites to mess heavily with my too allergic body. I also may have a cold. - - - I should make a list of all the places I ought to call in the morning. - - - I have a feeling we are going to have to face several unwanted circustances as regards our trying to move the b thing. Tuesday 26DEC00 - B thing or no, and though a second from now I may be dead or gravely stricken, I yet want to repay what I owe, and will attempt to do so. I realize that being without certain protective insur- ances may in the end thwart my ability to do that, but I yet will try. Wednesday 27DEC00 - A cousin forwarded through a sister a 2001 message from the Dalai Lama. Because of the wisdom in it, I have begun passing it on to numerous others. Thursday 28DEC00 - Got two checks today. Am due to get one check 1-12-01 if I last at my present employment. I want to last, but it is hard on my small weak body. I also hope to find a second job. One that would go from 5pm to 10pm. I also hope to fashion a new career which--if I am able to do it--will allow me to earn some real money. Friday 29DEC00 - St. Thomas Becket. First sentence of the Comment section reads: "No one becomes a saint without struggle, especially with himself." Saturday 30DEC00 - Long hard day at Chick-fil-A. Spent this morning seeking out online addresses for other good persons I wanted to send a greeting of mine to along with the Dalai Lama mantra. Unwisely-- being unwise seems to be a congenital defect in me--I several times sent my greeting to more than one person. Perhaps it was the cousin influence, but once I realized the impropriety of doing that, I thereafter sent to one person at a time. Sunday 31DEC00 - Called my aunt. Called my father. Called my Sister sister twice. - - - My mind is spinning. Hope mixed with fear & trembling engage in a macabre dance in my spirit. - - - Happy new millenium. 6 Rho00043
Monday, March 24, 2008
brian's brain p6
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